


Let's Go Home

by spazzgirl



Category: Captain America - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, CACW spoilers, F/M, Feels, oh god i cried while writing this, romanogers - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-08
Updated: 2016-04-08
Packaged: 2018-05-31 23:33:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,582
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6492136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spazzgirl/pseuds/spazzgirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>home, the one place in the world he wanted oh so desperately. “I want to go home,” he sobbed softly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let's Go Home

**Author's Note:**

> So how long has it been since I’ve written anything non-smutty? HAHAHAHA! Ages LOL.
> 
> Based on the new still with Steve and Natasha in a church right after Peggy’s funeral. Also please listen to “Unsteady” by X Ambassador. I apologize in advance for the butchered Russian, Google Translate man, what are you gonna do. 
> 
> IT GAVE ME SO MUCH ROMANOGERS FEELS!!
> 
> Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of any characters used

_ _

_“_ _There’s not enough time. This thing's moving too fast and it's heading for New York. I gotta put her in the water._

_“Please don't do this. W-we have time. We can work it out.”_

_“Right now I'm in the middle of nowhere. If I wait any longer a lot of people are gonna die. Peggy, this is my choice.” Steve looks at the picture of her in his compass. “Peggy...”_

_“I'm here.”_

_“I'm gonna need a rain check on that dance.”_

_“All right. A week next Saturday at The Stork Club.”_

_“You've got it.”_

_Peggy could feel the tears in her eyes ready to fall. “Eight o'clock on the dot. Don't you dare be late. Understood?”_

_“You know, I still don't know how to dance._

_“I'll show you how. Just be there._

_“We'll have the band play something slow.” The blond soldier breathes in, his voice shaking slightly. “I'd hate to step on your...”_

* * *

 

That was the last time Steve had spoken to her before he dove into the Arctic Circle and had begun his 70 years of slipping into the frozen darkness. How he woke up to a different time, a different place. The pain in his heart as he knew he had fail to keep his promise to Peggy. It wasn’t until a few years later that he had given an update of the nursing home that the former agent was in.

* * *

 

Steve felt so much pain that day when he had first visited Peggy.

_“Steve, is that you?”_

_The soldier could feel his heart beginning to ache in so much pain. “Hey Peg.”_

_“You look so young.”_

_He took her frail and withering hands into his big strong ones. “I couldn’t leave my best girl. Not when she owes me a dance.”_

_“Oh Steve.”_

* * *

 

He wanted to cry each time he visited, how she easily forgot some of their previous conversations. That his old flame was suffering from Alzheimer. It felt like some cruel punishment, breaking his promise and in return Peggy’s mind was wilting away. Every time he visited, he kept seeing her as the same strong young woman he had first met. That he knew deep down that she was still the same woman who had fallen for him as Steve Rogers and not Captain America.

Though Steve realized that fate can be even crueler. The images in his head when he had his first fight with Wanda back in Africa.

* * *

 

_“Steve.” He turned around, his eyes widening in surprised. There she was standing in all of her former glory. Beautiful and radiant. “Are you ready for our dance?”_

_He spun her around and pressed her close to him as she came into his arms._

_“The war’s over Steve. We can go home.” Within that very instant he was all alone in the ballroom._

_After seeing Thor fly away Steve found himself in the threshold of Clint’s house._

_“We can go home.” Her haunting voice whispered into his head._

* * *

 

Steve found himself leaning on the pews as he felt his head getting dizzy.

* * *

 

_“Steve.” He found himself waking up. His hands brushing against the soft grass. “Steve.” The soldier found himself looking up at Peggy. Wearing a beautiful red dress, the same dress she wore in that bar after he rescued the 107 th. Giving him that loving smile he adored so much. “Steve, we can go home.”_

_The blond reached out to her as he stood up. Their hands interlacing and he could feel her warmth._

_“Peggy.” He breathed out. “I want to go home,” he sobbed softly.”_

_“I know darling.” Peggy placed a loving hand on his cheek and he nuzzled softly against it. “Let’s go home Steve.”_

Steve found himself snapping out of that daydream. The dream of _what ifs_.

_What if I didn’t crash the plane?_

_What if I just gave my coordinates to Peggy?_

* * *

 

The things he wanted with her, the dreams, the life he wanted with her were all naught. Steve would always have the memory of carrying her casket in and out of the church in his mind. That the last time he ever held Margaret Carter was when he had to carry her casket into the limo that would drive to the graveyard where she would be buried.

_Next to her husband_

Steve ended up clutching the pews to the point where he nearly dented them. Strange how he was jealous of a dead man, a man who gave the same love that he himself was supposed to give to Peggy. That this man had given her a life that Steve wanted with her. The soldier knew that instant that he no longer had a home. From finding out that she was happily married to one last goodbye he whispered before the limo drove off. Steve felt himself lost, even more than when he had woken up.

“I’m sorry Peggy,” he whispered into the empty church. “I’m so sorry that I broke our promise again.” Steve was truly a man out of time now.

The sounds of heels filled the empty church.

_“Steve.”_

_Was his mind playing tricks on him?_

_“Steve.”_

_No she’s supposed to be dead_

_‘Steve.”_

_I’m afraid if I look up, that this is all a dream_

He found himself looking up as a pair of small warm hands cupped his face. Instead of looking into a pair of hazel eyes, they were a pair of beautiful emerald eyes.

“You okay there soldier?” Steve could hear how worried she was.

“Yeah.” He lied to both himself and to her.

Natasha gave a small smile. “You’re a terrible liar Rogers.” Steve found himself laughing softly at her words. “You don’t have to lie to me Steve.” Her thumb stroked his cheek so gently. “Didn’t you say you were always honest?”

“I know.” He looked down. “I just can’t believe she’s gone, you know? One day I see her taking on HYRDA soldiers, the next she’s being buried.” It was hard for him to accept that she was gone. “I’m a man out of time,” he choked out, the tears falling down his face. “I didn’t realize it until now. How much it hurts, to say goodbye to someone you really care about.” The pain in his heart was too unbearable for him. “I couldn’t say goodbye to her, not when I just got her back.”

Steve found himself in the spy’s warm embrace. His body racked as he cried his heart out. Natasha held him tightly as she stroked his back.

“I feel so lost Tasha.” Steve whimpered against her shoulder. “I feel so lost and alone.”

 He could hear her whisper soft words on comfort and then found himself calming down as she began to sing in Russian.

“You’re not alone Steve.” Natasha cupped his face in her hands again. “And if you ever find yourself feeling lost. Just reach for me and I’ll guide you. I’ll be your light in the dark.” He eased into her hand as she brushed a few of his golden locks back.

Steve found himself in her embrace once again. His ears picking up what she was whispering to him in Russian.

Poshli domoy

_Let’s go home_

His blue eyes wondered down at her hand as she walked next to him.

* * *

 

_“That girl,” Steve looked at her with curious eyes. “The red head, she seems like a nice girl.” Her eyes wandered onto Natasha’s as she watched the two from afar._

_He laughed at that. “Yeah, if you don’t mind her using her signature move, death by thighs.”_

_Peggy smiled at the playfulness in his voice. “She seems to care about you Steve.”_

_“I’m her friend after all.”_

_The former founder of SHIELD giggled. “Oh Steve, you’re so dramatic.” She took his hand and brushed the back. “I sense something in her.” Peggy smiled fondly at the spy, the moment she turned her back to scan the area. “I believe fate sent her to you for a purpose.”_

_Steve looked at her curiously. “What are you talking about Peggy?”_

_“That whenever you feel lost, let her in Steve.” Her other hand cupped his face. “Let her guide you in your time of need. Let her be your light in the darkness.” Peggy smiled at him fondly. “Don’t let your second chance go by Steve. Promise me.”_

_“Peg,” he understood what she was asking of him. “You know I can’t forget you.”_

_“I know Steve, but sometimes the best we can do is move on.” He smiled at the words she had told him before. “We can’t go back Steve, you have a future. You have a_ home _with her.” Steve’s eyes slightly widened. “Don’t let that go to waste by holding onto the past.”_

* * *

 

Natasha stopped the moment she felt Steve’s hand holding onto hers. “Steve?”

He smiled at with tenderness and care. “You said that if I ever felt lost, that all I had to do was reach out and you’d guide me.”

The spy smiled back at him, their fingers interlaced and she guided him to the closed doors of the church. Turning back she gave him one more smile.

“Poshli domoy soldat.”

Once she pushed the door open, Steve found himself looking at her. The light of the sun shining down gently at her, giving her a heavenly look. As if she was an angel sent down from heaven to help guide him.

_Let’s go home soldier_

Steve found himself no longer lost and no longer alone.

**Author's Note:**

> If you’re crying and you know it, clap your hands!


End file.
